The Last Two Years

As an artist, what I’ve learned in the last two years has surpassed that which I’ve learned over the course of my life. An obvious reason for this is college- the greenhouse for development and growth. I want to delve into what the last two years have been for me because they are so influential to what I am doing and why. 

Freshman Year

            I go to John Brown University in Siloam Springs, AR where I study Fine Art and Entrepreneurship. Studying art in college was and still is a big deal for me. I never thought I was going to. I was supposed to do business or something more academic and maybe minor in art. I and my family were too “realistic” to consider a major in art. Thus, when I got to college and changed to pursuing two degrees, one in art and one in business, I could satisfy both my desire to focus on art and my parents concern that I have a marketable degree. It was the best decision. I immediately was thrown into 3 art classes my first semester and I absolutely loved it. I was apprehensive because I’m primarily self-taught, and what formal teaching I have comes from my small high school. I was surprised to find that most of my peers had even less experience than I did. Anyway, I was so at peace and excited to be doing what I was. I was creating my best work both in and out of class. I was improving in mediums that it didn’t make sense for me to be improving in because I wasn’t practicing them regularly. It was all going to so well. I was recognized as one of the top freshman art majors and year one as an art student wrapped wonderfully. I had developed incredible relationships with my professors and found friends who valued art and supported my art in ways I had never before experienced. Year one finished, and I couldn’t have been in a better place.

Summer 2017

             I was studying abroad with the art department. One month in Ireland studying drawing and printmaking. Two weeks touring Italy and all the major art spots, including parts of the Venice Biennale. A dream. Yet my time in Ireland was so artistically frustrated. For the first time, I was really pushed outside of my comfort zone artistically in ways I had no control over. In the past, when I was pushed artistically, I had the time to work it out and learn on my own time. But we only had 2 weeks to draw and 2 weeks to print.  I was so discouraged by the quality of my work. I am a perfectionist (though I denied it for years) and I need time (and time alone) to work. Thus, the whirlwind that was Ireland left me incredibly frustrated that my art was lacking, and I couldn’t control the outcome. This led to incredible and challenging conversations with my professor. I still reference those conversions as I pursue art today. I needed that time to humble myself and shift my paradigm towards a growth focus over an achievement focus and a community focus over my own focus. 

Sophomore Year        

            This past year has been my most artistically dry year yet. However, it’s also a year that sparked many artistic opportunities. Over the course of the year, I only had 1 studio art class and 2 digital art classes. The rest of my 9 classes of sophomore year were business classes. To say that it was imbalanced would be an understatement. That being said, I was flourishing in the business department. I experienced much success and opportunity within the business school. Some of that even transferred to art. For one of my business classes, I spent the entire semester studying the relationship between art and society. I was also very involved in the art department, planning events and continually building my relationships there. My growth in the arts was academic and knowledge-based over practice and skill. I felt the gap though. Whenever I did get to draw or paint, I could feel the lack of practice and see it surface in my work. This was extremely discouraging to me. Thus, going into summer, I was determined to focus on my art and my art alone. 

Summer 2018

            Summer kicked off and I quickly (and surprising) landed 2 jobs. You may guess that this put a damper on my singular focus on art. And it did. Over the course of this summer, I’ve only done digital art, 2 illustrations, 1 portrait, and ¼ of a painting. A small body of work for about 3 months’ time. I have had a steady stream of commissions, but they have all been digital—a new medium to me and also not preferred. So while, I have been able to make some money on my art, I have not made much personal progress on my own projects. However, one of my jobs has been in a fine art gallery in downtown KC. This has been an incredible learning experience. I’ve learned more about the art community and how it functions and interacts with artists than ever before. I was completely immersed, meeting artists and collectors every day. It was a dream come true. Yet again, it was a trade-off. While I didn’t get to work on my art as much, I learned exponentially more than I could have anticipated. This summer has also been one of reaching towards professionalism, hence the website. It was my goal to get business cards, start a website, and write regularly. I have actually met those goals. It is extremely important to me to write about the arts and what I’m learning. While I may not have gotten all the hands-on experience with my artwork, I have had an incredible amount of experience and growth intellectually on the topics. This website is important for me to have because it encourages me to develop both my art and my understanding of it through writing. As this summer ends, I approach a semester equally balanced in the arts and business. I anticipate opportunities both in and out of the classroom to learn and develop as an artist and business woman. I am more excited and apprehensive for what this semester entails than ever before. I am confident that growth in my artistic practice and in my knowledge of the arts will be prevalent. 

July 2018